Project Awesome

Making my life more awesome

Pleasing myself

on November 9, 2012

Scarborough is not all that.  Whitby, on the other hand, is lovely.  Crashing waves, a gorgeous beach, little pokey shops, a swing bridge that opens to let boats through, quaint twisty cobbled streets, an abbey and a church on a cliff, and lots of lovely food – when I’m old I’m going to retire there and own a second-hand bookshop.

I got to Scarborough on Wednesday and I hated it.  I hated everything – people were rude (I went into the theatre to pick up tickets I’d booked and the woman behind the counter ignored me.  She didn’t even look like she was ignoring me on purpose).  It was cold.  The lift didn’t work in my hotel.  The hotel was shabby.  There were no towels.  My lunch was burnt.  Scarborough was not charming at all.  I realised, really quite quickly, that the problem was not Scarborough.  The problem was me.

This wasn’t my first holiday by myself. I went to Edinburgh for a few nights twelve years ago, just before I started going out with Ex-Husband.  A lot has happened in the past decade-and-a-bit.  I’ve been on holiday quite a few times, so it’s not a new experience.  I’ve learnt how to have a good holiday with Ex-Husband.  I’ve had two children and lost every minute of my day to them, to work, to housework.  And suddenly I found myself on holiday in a strange place with no idea what I wanted to do, tired, having nothing to do except please myself and being brutally reminded that I am on my own with no-one else to please.

You’ll be pleased to hear that I did get used to pleasing myself, really quite quickly.  I slept.  I read the Hunger Games trilogy (which I am adding to the list of books I wish I’d written). I pottered around shops at my own pace.  I watched Skyfall.  Actually, I quite liked being on holiday by myself.  There’s a joy to suddenly stopping on a beach to read for forty minutes – I couldn’t really imagine Ex-Husband wanting to wander round the beach in circles looking cold and bored until I was ready to go.  None of that negotiating over which attractions to visit or where to eat.  I’m not saying I didn’t miss the company, but like everything else, there are compensations for being cruelly abandoned by your husband to live life alone…

My holiday was also improved by the serendipitous fact that my best friend works in Scarborough. (I know.  Really, who doesn’t know which town their best friend of 18 years works in?).  So we went to the theatre together to see Inspector Norse, wave Sporclas and eat icecream.  We were hoping to meet for lunch today but unfortunately work claimed her attentions.  I did like the combination of holiday and visit  and am thinking of replicating it around the country, visiting amazing friends and interesting places in a glorious mash-up holi-visit.

Oh, and I took my laptop with me, just in case, and had the inspired idea to watch West Wing on the train.  Possibly the best train journey ever.

 

 

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2 responses to “Pleasing myself

  1. Myn says:

    May I be the first to invite you for a holi-visit (you’d better trademark the name before it catches on)? Gloucestershire’s lovely…

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